Mr. Bones
Mr. Bones was born in the distant lands of the BBQ mines of Kansas City in the year 1980. He was born and raised to smoke meat and throw great parties. As a boy Mr. Bones dreamt of entering his smoked meat in the American Royal BBQ. He looked forward to it like a pig runs toward a puddle of mud. But, he could only learn so much from his parents.
In order to become the best BBQ smoker in all the land, he moved out of his parent's house and into the underground grease pits of the Kemper Arena parking lot where the American Royal is held every year. He peared through the grates to watch and study the best BBQ smokers in the world. As time passed, Mr. Bones smoked and fed his meat to his underground friends.
Once he had 100% approval, he entered his camp in the American Royal BBQ contest. The year 2000 marked his first year. Finally, in 2003 Mr Bones won 10th place in brisquet (10th out of 500 smokers). In 2004, his success went to his head. He focused more on the Friday Night Party than on his meat. Mr. Bones brought more people to enjoy his prize winning meat, beer and music. He partnered with the team next door to widen his space and invited more people. The crowds poured in. Mr. Bones had earned a reputation for the best meat and a better party. Then in 2005, Mr. Bones tried a new smoker. It was a steal barrel of a thing that burned his arms as he turned his meat. In 2006, Mr. Bones came in $#%*!th place and he vowed to return to his roots and set his goal for 1st place. He's brought on a new sponsor and has picked up a new smoker.
Mr. bones vowes to buy the best meat in Kansas City and smoke it according to the tradition he was brought up on. And now that he has the best party and most loyal fans at the American Royal, he can get back to his roots.
Mr. Bones
Mr. Bones was born in the distant lands of the BBQ mines of Kansas City in the year 1980. He was born and raised to smoke meat and throw great parties. As a boy Mr. Bones dreamt of entering his smoked meat in the American Royal BBQ. He looked forward to it like a pig runs toward a puddle of mud. But, he could only learn so much from his parents.
In order to become the best BBQ smoker in all the land, he moved out of his parent's house and into the underground grease pits of the Kemper Arena parking lot where the American Royal is held every year. He peared through the grates to watch and study the best BBQ smokers in the world. As time passed, Mr. Bones smoked and fed his meat to his underground friends.
Once he had 100% approval, he entered his camp in the American Royal BBQ contest. The year 2000 marked his first year. Finally, in 2003 Mr Bones won 10th place in brisquet (10th out of 500 smokers). In 2004, his success went to his head. He focused more on the Friday Night Party than on his meat. Mr. Bones brought more people to enjoy his prize winning meat, beer and music. He partnered with the team next door to widen his space and invited more people. The crowds poured in. Mr. Bones had earned a reputation for the best meat and a better party. Then in 2005, Mr. Bones tried a new smoker. It was a steal barrel of a thing that burned his arms as he turned his meat. In 2006, Mr. Bones came in $#%*!th place and he vowed to return to his roots and set his goal for 1st place. He's brought on a new sponsor and has picked up a new smoker.
Mr. bones vowes to buy the best meat in Kansas City and smoke it according to the tradition he was brought up on. And now that he has the best party and most loyal fans at the American Royal, he can get back to his roots.
Peerless Mr Bones
submitted by Walter Emerson
(after he noticed we misspelled "peer")
Peering through the fog we see a pair of pears on the pier.
We steel our criminal nerves, my peer and I, as we prepare to thieve.
Stealing guilty glances we loose our steely lances and pare the pair of pears on the pier.
With guts of steel, we dare to pair the pared pair of pier pears with the saucey blood of Mr. Bones.
Ahhh, Mr. Bones - nonpareil!
Peerless Mr Bones
submitted by Walter Emerson
(after he noticed we misspelled "peer")
Peering through the fog we see a pair of pears on the pier.
We steel our criminal nerves, my peer and I, as we prepare to thieve.
Stealing guilty glances we loose our steely lances and pare the pair of pears on the pier.
With guts of steel, we dare to pair the pared pair of pier pears with the saucey blood of Mr. Bones.
Ahhh, Mr. Bones - nonpareil!
Meat Head
Meat Head has been with Mr. Bones from the beginning. He is the official Guest Host and aspiring Prep Cook. As soon as he earns his arms, he'll be able to make the rub and season the meat. For now, Meat Head is content with being the light of the party. He welcomes the guests, announces the dinner, pours the beer and dances throughout the night. Saturday morning comes at 4 in the afternoon for Meat Head. He sleeps through the contest and clean up then wakes up for brisquet scraps and the announcement of the scores. With a full head and dying flame, Saturday night begins his 363 day hibernation. The much needed rest will give him enough fuel to wake up and light the party next year.
If you look closely at the photos from previous years you'll see Mr. Bones in action.
Meat Head
Meat Head has been with Mr. Bones from the beginning. He is the official Guest Host and aspiring Prep Cook. As soon as he earns his arms, he'll be able to make the rub and season the meat. For now, Meat Head is content with being the light of the party. He welcomes the guests, announces the dinner, pours the beer and dances throughout the night. Saturday morning comes at 4 in the afternoon for Meat Head. He sleeps through the contest and clean up then wakes up for brisquet scraps and the announcement of the scores. With a full head and dying flame, Saturday night begins his 363 day hibernation. The much needed rest will give him enough fuel to wake up and light the party next year.
If you look closely at the photos from previous years you'll see Mr. Bones in action.
